Driving and Crying

Like many areas, this county where I live has a few quirks. Many of the people are nice, there are a million churches, it seems everyone has a truck, and I think it is against the law to own an acre and not have at least one abandoned vehicle in your front yard.

The most irritating quirk is the way many of the residents of this quaint mountain county drive. Many of the residents seem to think turn signals were options not included on their specific vehicle. Young or old, regardless of the condition of the car (or truck), the vast majority of drivers simply do not use their turn signal. Now I recognize that some may have a signal that does not work or a turn light could be out. That said, there is absolutely no way this many folks can have trouble with their turn signals all at the same time. What I don't know for sure, but suspect, is drivers that do not signal are in a couple of camps.

• Everybody knows where I live so I don't need to use a signal
• I just got distracted and forgot to turn the signal on
  
• I don't care what the law is, I ain't goin' to use that @#$% signal 'cause I pay taxes, I pay the salary of the PO-lice and if'n they pull me over I aim to remind 'em of that

Now of course I don't know this for sure, and this a great assumption on my part. I figure the first one is the most common. Many folks have lived in the same area for years and years. So they probably think everyone knows they are going to turn. What I would not doubt is that a large percentage of drivers in this county have that third reason in mind. These same folks throw the cellophane from their cigarettes out on the road and refuse to buckle their seat belts. Laws and rules are for others, not them. The second reason is probably the least common, yet most understandable. It is easy to get distracted while talking on your phone, lighting a cigarette, yelling at one of the kids, getting the dog out of the way so you can see and throwing your beer can into the bed of the truck as you drive. Who wouldn't be distracted?

The other type of driver that bothers me is the "Sunday Driver." My parents referred to these drivers when I was a kid. These were the kinds of drivers who often took a drive on Sunday after church. They were in no hurry and had no particular place to go. It seems like a large number of drivers in this area have no concept of "speed limit." I know and understand that the speed limit is supposed to be the maximum speed that can be safely driven on a specific stretch of road. All I am asking is that they approach the speed limit. I mean, like come somewhat close to it. Do you know how infuriating it is to travel 15 miles below the speed limit on a 2 lane road? When you see a line of 37 cars behind you, you probably need to either speed up or get off the road!!! Highway 70 is one of the main arteries for transportation in our area. I understand a loaded 18 wheeler or dump truck or school bus traveling slowly, or when there is poor weather. That makes sense. What does not make sense is a perfectly sunny day, when a driver will decide to mandate the speed everyone else can drive by traveling along at 35 mph in a 55 mph zone in their 1990 Ford Aerostar. Or maybe that does make sense.

The last type of driver I cannot fathom is those on a "Liquor Cycle." For those not from this area, this is a person who normally has lost their license, often from something along the lines of D.U.I., that drives on the main roads on a motorized scooter. Now you might think that losing a license should prevent someone from driving. Not in North Carolina! As long as you are the legal age to drive the scooter, you can drive one. No license is required! At least these folks are trying to get to and from work, however they drive on the main roads, and even when they pull a little closer to the shoulder they still block the road. These scooters don't go very fast. The line of cars stretches miles behind the scooter. But at least they wear a helmet for when those in real automobiles get up real close and knock them into a ditch.

As I said, this area has some positives. The driving is certainly not one of them. And I am certainly glad no one can ever complain about my driving! I learned to drive in Atlanta. If you ain't bumping and drafting you ain't trying.

So while I appreciate the slower pace of the area, I do not like the driving skills exhibited here. Maybe I should open a driving school. Anybody have a car with break pedals on both sides?